Awesome Typos

Do yourself a favor and go visit Damn You Autocorrect

It is an entire site devoted to mishaps using smart phones when Autocorrect fills in the wrong word.  When I try to text my name on my phone it tries to replace it with either MEGHAN (I kinda like the caps lock approach but it makes me seem a little conceited) or meghaninwonderland (as if all I am is a blogger).

The top of the site also shows their other websites.  They have one devoted to strange receipts (like yesterday when my father got a receipt for a "trouble light") and one for epic WTFs.

Here are a few examples.

And a few receipts

I added a link on my sidebar under "Cohorts; blogs I read" so it is easy to access.  Just try not to laugh when reading these.  My stomach muscles actually ache from laughing so hard. 

Second Base

So, apparently there is a big "scandal" right now with airport security. And please picture me doing air quotes when I say "scandal". You know, the kind of "scandals" that FOX News creates and then backs up in its future broadcasts. It seems that some people are offended by the "enhanced pat down" procedures. Yep, more air quotes. I experienced these new procedures when leaving Dulles to head home from the rally in D.C.

Here's the story. The TSA agent (a cute guy about my age) "randomly" selected me for a screening. (Just get used to the air quotes. It's how I express my irony). I say "randomly" because it became clear that he just wanted to chat me up. So I was put in plexiglass prison for about five minutes while he asked me what my sign is (not really that line, it's not the 90's, but you get the point). From prison I went to the "formal pat down area" with a female TSA agent. The pat down took about another 3 minutes, about equal to the time it takes me to put my shoes back on after the security check. I have to put them on standing up and inevitably end up doing the sideways hop trying not to fall down while simultaneously tying my shoes. Don't judge, you've done that dance.

Anyway, during the pat down I asked cousin Karen to take a picture of me. The picture was supposed to be funny, but I'm considering sending it to FOX News as "evidence" of "molestation". Can't you just see the pain on my face?

My point - and there is one - is that the complainers should grow up, grow a pair, suck it up, put on their big girl panties, and put things in perspective.
Not necessarily in that order. "Thank You".

Holy Published Photographer, Batman!

You read right.  One of my photographs was published in California Homes Magazine's November issue.  It still doesn't seem real.  It is the full page picture of the party table.  If you would like a copy and don't know where to find one, just email me.

Oh, and that buzzing sound?  It's my brain trying to wrap itself around this.

Tomorrow, And Tomorrow, And Tomorrow

I didn't post anything for Veteran's Day this year, I just had a lot to do. It's not that there are no Veterans in my family, there are quite a few, I just had a lot to do. Perhaps I would write something tomorrow or the next day.

Tonight on the NBC Nightly News, Brian Williams interviewed the newest Medal of Honor recipient, Sgt. Giunta. Giunta said that his fallen comrades were the real heroes because "they gave up all of their tomorrows".

I don't like these wars or who started them or who funded them. I don't like what they have done to yet another generation of American men and women.

Despite all of that, you can't deny that many people "gave up all of their tomorrows".

I sometimes think of comedian Mike Birbiglia, who in his act said that he respects the troops because "without them, I would be the troops".

Here are a few of my troops. They made it back. And I have more tomorrows to come.

July 1945.  My Grandfather and Grandmother on the Rockefeller Center Roof Studio.  He was on leave and had not yet met his 11 month old son.  His son went on to serve as well.  

January 1931.  My Great Grandfather who, at 14 years old, forced his mother to forge his papers so he could join the Navy and fight in WWI.  He went on to serve in WWII and in Texas law enforcement.

Determination

Recently, a few people have asked me how my weight loss journey is going.  The answer is that it is going well!  I have actually just stopped Jenny Craig after six months on the program.  The two main reasons were the financial cost and, well, eating the same food for six whole months.  As I stop, I am going to phase into Weight Watchers again, just to keep my momentum going.

Sometimes I will plateau at a weight and get frustrated.  For example I will be within one pound, up or down, from a certain weight and not move much otherwise.  There are a few things that I do when I feel this frustration setting in.  One is that I exercise.  I walk about 12-18 miles a week, 3 miles at a time.  Getting my endorphins flowing is key.  The second thing that keeps me going through the frustration is remembering that even one pound up or down from a certain weight is roughly 50 pounds down from my highest ever weight.  Now, that's not in the past year, just over probably the past 3-4 years.  I ended up losing about 30 pounds on Jenny Craig and remind myself how far I have come.

The final things that keep me going, vain as it might sound, are your compliments and support.  Without all of you cheering for me and telling me how nice I look (or not recognizing me at first and doing a double take) I would not be here.  So from the bottom of my heart, I thank you.

For a comparison.  Here are two pictures, one from May 2008 right after I graduated college and went on my Europe trip, and the second you know from the sidebar.  Look what you helped me do...

Leftovers

I thought I would just share a few leftover stories from my D.C. trip that didn't really fit into any post but that I thought you might like.

The estimated number of rally goers was 200,000 or more. Each of which came with a cell phone/smart phone/iPad, etc. So many people were trying to call friends to tell them about the rally or send pictures that the cell towers crashed. I know AT&T and Verizon and Sprint were down and suspect others were too. You haven't seen funny until you have seen over 200,000 people realize they have no cell service. People were looking around as if it was the end of days.

After the rally and a long day of sightseeing we left dinner to head home on the Metro. I said to my travel mates "I'm fine as long as I'm horizontal", meaning "get me to a seated position as soon as possible". My cousin, seven years older, and quite quick witted and a meanie, took that little slip up and ran with it. It will be a while before I live that one down.

I flew Southwest Airlines on this trip and was happy that I did. I know they like their crews to be funny and sometimes they are, and sometimes it feels forced. Well, I flew back on Halloween and was so glad that I did. First, here are a few quotes from our flight attendants on that flight.

"If the oxygen mask falls and you are traveling with a small child, place the mask on your child first. If you are traveling with more children, pick your favorite and work your way down."

"Please be careful removing objects from overhead bins, as they tend to shift during flight. And as we all know, shift happens."

And after a bumpy landing "Ladies and gentlemen, that wasn't the pilot's fault or the crew's fault. It was the asphalt."

And I saved the best for last. Everyone received one free "adult beverage" on the flight. Little did we know that nothing is really free. Anyone who fell asleep on the flight was a slumbering victim for the crew. The flight attendant would come up to anyone sound asleep and wrap them up, mummy style to their seat, with toilet paper. Watching that person wake up was the purest form of entertainment.

Hysterics

Remember Hayden?  I photographed him as a newborn and through the next couple of months.  Well here is a video his mom just sent me.  In the video his mom is throwing a tennis ball for the dog while Hayden's uncle films.  It cracks me up every time.