Boston Area Driving Hints And Tips

Okay, I have a confession to make.  I was wrong about how much it sucks to drive in Boston.  It sucks.  Hard.  I'm not sure what the other drivers are thinking but my thoughts usually go something like this:

   "Alrighty, pull out of the driveway and...wait, why is my street blocked off.  Oh, it's just a couple of hundred people double parked.  Everything is good...hang on, is this a rotary?  Damn, it is.  How many lanes is it?!  Why aren't there any lines?! Let me out!  Let me out!  I'm alive!!! Wait, why is everyone turning?  Is this a turn only lane?  But I'm in the middle lane! Okay, moving over.  Let me in!  Let me in!!  Ooh, that guy doesn't like me.  OH MY GOD THERE'S A TRAIN COMING!  AM I ON THE T LINE?!  That was close.  Now, the GPS says that my destination is at the next right.  Wait, there are three rights and four lefts at the next intersection.  Which fork do I take?!  Excuse me.  Pardon me.  Oh, go to hell! Okay, made it through the intersection.  Wait, why is that guy coming right at me?  Am I on a one way street?  OH MY GOD I AM!  But, wait, HE'S THE ONE GOING THE WRONG WAY!  Phew, I made it.  Now how do I get home?"

I'm sure I will continue this series as I learn to drive like a Bostonian, but here are my first observations:

1. People generally go 15-25 miles above the speed limit and will sit three inches off your rear bumper if you don't.
2. There are two places for informational road signs - six inches before an intersection and ten feet after an intersection (the latter saying, basically "you should have turned there, now you're screwed").
3. There are two ways, and only two ways, that people give directions here: "Oh, that's easy to get to" and "You can't get there from here".  
4. Blinkers are for pussies.
5. Merge and Yield are not recognized words in Massachusetts.
6. Why park when you can double park?  
7. A two lane road anywhere else is a four lane road here.  Most of the time there aren't lines on the street.  I imagine at some point there was a conversation like this:

             "Hey Bernie, how many lanes should this road be?"
             "I don't know Ray, I guess it depends on how big the cars are."
             "Then we shouldn't put lines on the road.  We don't want to confuse anyone."
             "Wicked smart man, wicked smart."

Complain about any of this and you will get the following explanation -
"Well, the roads were laid out for horses and carriages".

I understand that, but there have been some upgrades since then.  Right?