Dear Rednecks,

Welcome to the Bay Area!  I understand there is a hick convention Nascar race at Infineon/Sears Point this weekend.  This popular raceway happens to be on my commute home.  I also understand that many of you have arrived in your redneck-mobiles Recreational Vehicles.  I see that you have brought your toothless parents and cross eyed children families.  But please be advised that this raceway lies along a 2 lane road with a 55 mph speed limit.  Please don't allow your children to cross the road unattended or I will have to run them over slow to a stop.  Also, know that when you fly flags above your little campers with the number of your favorite racer you look stupid stand out. 

Thank you for coming to the Bay Area and please don't molest the farm animals enjoy yourself.